Something has been bothering me…

This is only a minor rant, but it’s something I feel I need to get off my chest

Recently I have found that most gay porn stars will only really communicate with people better well known than them or stars who can further said “porn stars” career (and just to clarify I am NOT referring to one single person).

I personally find that I am happy working in porn with most people, well known or now. I have worked with newbies, old pro’s and in between. I don’t need to work with well known names to further my career. Not that I am going to turn down a shoot with someone well known. At the end of the day it is work, which I am always extremely grateful for. I will not name drop and make a big deal out of people I know or have worked with, nor will I be picky and make comments like “I will never work with newbies again” as I full well know how nerve wracking it is to do your first porn shoot. You were a newbie once and someone gave you that chance, respect that and don’t be a dick.

My other issue is arrogance. Arrogance has never sat well with me and I have made a point of avoiding people who are overly cocky and arrogant. There is no need to put yourself above everyone else, you do gay porn and I do gay porn, at the end of the day we both suck cock on camera and get fucked/fuck on camera as well, there is very little difference between me and you and what we do. Yes you may get paid more, get more work etc, but that’s all you see it as…you don’t respect the industry and you certainly don’t respect other people within the industry. I personally love doing porn, and in all honesty I am probably one of very few people who actually genuinely love doing porn.

I know I am not your stereotypical porn star, I don’t have muscles, I don’t have the biggest cock and I’m not the best looking. I am fully aware of these facts and I do try to work on what I have got. I am very willing to do new things, I do have a big cock, I am a very good bottom (all this is what I have been told by other people so I am not being arrogant or bragging).

I do realize that arrogance, self-importance and over-confidence are a huge part of being in porn, straight or gay and I am sorry but I cannot conform to a stereotype within a minority of a minority. Being gay is bad enough in this world (as I am sure you know), however being gay and doing porn is considered in the UK as not a very good thing and there is a huge stigma attached to doing porn in the UK which is that if you do porn you must have numerous STD’s and have HIV etc. This is a common misconception and totally without fact, however, when a gay man doing porn is getting hassle and stick from other gay men (who no doubt have watched porn) makes me so angry. But what makes me more angrier is when you are a bi-sexual man doing porn, gay/straight/bisexual and getting hassle from every factor…now THAT is unacceptable. Yes I am bi-sexual, no I am not confused, yes I am happy…stop judging me, and stop being so narrow minded. You were unaccepted for a long time and now you have a reasonable amount of equality, it does NOT give you the right to now pass judgement and criticize what I do with my life. You are taking this whole equality movement back by 10 steps, you are not helping…stop being so narrow minded and accept the fact that there might actually be people out there who do prefer either sex.

Back to the porn bit. Yes I have had issues with JP Dubois recently, as I am sure you would have seen on Twitter. I do NOT wish bad on him, and this is purely a clash of personalities and opinions in my opinion (whether he agrees or not is his choice), I do NOT wish bad on him as a few of you are suggesting and I certainly an not jealous of him or his achievements. I respect what he has done and congratulate him for it. However, we do not blend as personalities and seem to disagree on numerous things. I am fine with this and am willing to keep our contact professional and leave it at that. If I was asked to work with him, I would not say no as it is work (I doubt whether this opinion is shared but that’s my outlook).

All in all I love working in porn, even though in the UK it cannot be made into a full time career unless you’re awesome. I will always support this industry and follow it through thick and thin. I do realize I don’t get a lot of work and that maybe to the fact I am not the stereotypical porn star, I am not a clone and I don’t have the typical porn body. Yet, I went to America and managed to get 4-5 shoots out there, yes not for huge major studios that every seems to be clamoring to get work for, but I managed to get shoots. I am not expecting any American studio to pay for my flights and accommodation out there, as that would be extortionate, rude and highly anticipatory. I went out to America to see friends I met off Twitter, @Gambit244, @FanForeskin, @TommyWellsNet and numerous others. I luckily managed to get work out there and will continue to do so when I next go out there, because I have made those connections out of my own pocket and time.

So to bring this to a close, I would love to see more porn stars really respect and appreciate the work they do. Models not turning up to shoots and cancelling etc really grinds me, they have been given an opportunity of work, which in this climate is very few and far between. I am very happy to work and very excited when I get a job. Porn will never be out of the shadows and dark when the people involved in it don’t give it the respect it deserves.

Come on people, respect one of the oldest professions in the world, the sex industry. Stop judging us, stop the conflict and bitchiness within the industry and for fucks sake respect each other!

Now I better get to sleep because I have to find a way to get to Berlin Friday morning lol!

Kieron
xx

Naughty Kieron! But good news…

Yes I do realise it has been a while since I have updated my little blog, however there is good reason behind this I promise you lol!

I have now moved from Manchester, and I am living in Essex (odd move I know) but it has more work opportunities, a fresh start and I can really concentrate on my work projects down here.

This year has been an odd one so far to say the least. Found out one of my very good friends has had a bad turn and has been in hospital for a while, I wish I could fly out to LA to see him and give him support, but the damn airfare is too expensive!

I have numerous work projects underway at the moment which will take a lot of my time up (not to mention money). I can’t reveal what it is at the moment, but all will be revealed in due course, all I can say is it will be massive!

Had a shock the other day. I was at a friends house and I got a tweet from a good friend saying something along the lines of “congratulations on your Hookie nomination”. Now for those of you that don’t know what the Hookies are, it’s an awards ceremony for the escorts on Rentboy.com (yes I do escorting now). I have only been on the website for a few weeks and already I am in the final selection of escorts to be nominated in the “Best Fetish” category. It’s amazing enough to be nominated for that, but winning it would be beyond belief. The link (if you would be so kind as to vote for me) is http://www.thehookies.com/vote.asp

I have had a quiet spell with porn work, this is a duck that has now been broken. I have a shoot coming up on Friday the 23rd, not saying who with and who for yet as it should be a bloody good shoot . The day of the shoot I will let you know who and who for. I have had a few photoshoots done as well recently, one by PicsByGaz and the other by @HawtPhoto in conjunction with Master U who generously provided me with an entire leather outfit for the shoot. Pics to come soon.

Other than that it’s been pretty quiet haha! I am still looking for more work, I seem to have generated a lot of interest from fellow porn stars who want to work with me…its very flattering and I wish I could work with them all! But I have to find a studio to film it! Lol

Anyway, I am gonna try and start to do some video updates…don’t know how I’m going to upload them via my iPad yet, but we shall see.

Keep safe and be good
Kieron

Remember, you can’t say the word “happiness” without saying the word “penis”

It’s an odd feeling, one I’ve not felt in a long long time. For as log as I can remember I’ve felt unhappy about something, something has been repressing me. But suddenly, as I’d the past decade of heartache, sadness and all that has just been wiped away, I feel happy…it feels like such a new emotion to me, something indescribable.

Yes I still have my rants, butim starting to have a positive outlook on them instead of beating myself up like I used to.

Yeah I’m getting no work, but hey, I’ve got plans in the works to solve that little issue.

Yeah certain people don’t deserve the work and attention they’re getting, but I’m taking satisfaction in karma…what goes around comes around.

My ex is dating other people, it hurts but hey, I can’t stop it so instead I’m wishing him well and hi
If it works with someone for him.

All in all I think I’m being rather cheery in my disposition. Something I’ve not been for a while. I feel like I’m going back to the real me…and you know what, I like it.

So I apologise for all the past rants, raves, downers ands alike. It was the result of an unhappy mind. One which seems *touch wood* to have been resolved, or muted to an extent.

So consider 2012 the year for a happy Kieron, a smiley Kieron and hopefully a Kieron that will buff up and get more work.

Love all
Kieron

P.S. thank you to all my twitter followers for helping me reach 5k followers. Without you, there would be no me. Love you all

Merry Christmas

Just a quick message to say, I wish all my followers a very Merry Christmas and I hope you all have a great holiday season

Much love
Kieron
Xxxxx

It’ll be lonely this Christmas…

Well, as you may or am not have seen on Twitter, I’m feeling rather lonely. To me it takes someone a whole lot of balls to admit when they are lonely.

I’m not alone, don’t get me wrong, there is a big difference between being alone and being lonely. And I’m most certainly not alone. I have friends and family around me, but yet I still feel lonely.

In all honesty it’s driving me somewhat mad, and it doesn’t help that the most dreaded time of year is almost upon us.

I normally don’t mind being on my own, and as a child growing up I learned to get used to my own company…years of bullying and being a recluse taught me that. I wish I hadn’t been that was as a child and teenager as its had a negative impact on my life today. I am painfully shy when I am in social situations and prefer to stay in the comfort of my bedroom rather than go out partying. Not a life at all for a 23 year old.

This may be a big fat factor in my issue of being lonely, but it’s something I don’t think friends or family can provide. It’s something more. And I can’t put my finger on it.

It can’t be a partner, cause I am not letting anyone get close to me at the moment, and not because I don’t want them to, I just can’t open up like I used to.

On a different note, I have people trying to fuck my head up, and it’s not fair.

This is the situation. As you know I became single (again), it came down to lack of communication (not on my part may I add) and generally drifted apart. This was a closure in my mind. I was content and happy with a definite end to proceedings as it were. This was fine with me, then one night out of the blue I get a text message, which didn’t help, cause it threw me right back to where I started. I accepted this text message and waited for further correspondence…nothing. I waited, and waited, sent messages, emails, tweets, waited some more. Nothing.

I eventually thought fuck it, I’m not wasting any more of my time. During this period I saw he had family issues, which I offered my condolences, which were ignored.

I had moved on, again. Getting back to being content, but yet constantly being reminded of him, normally by people asking me about him, mentioning him in conversation, or generally referring to me as “*******’s boyfriend”

I went away a the weekend just gone to have some photos done with a friend/photographer who is based a few miles away from my ex. Now I don’t know how the hell he knew I was in the area, it can’t have been via Twitter as he hasn’t paid any attention to it for 87 days (and the rest before we split), so that puzzled me. But the text he sent me while I was out with my friend, that was the icing on the cake.

It went along the lines of telling me which bus went nearest to him, how far away it was and if I wanted an explanation I should go round and stay at his the night while he tells me. I was happy to hear am explanation, cause I do believe that I deserve one. However, I did not know where I was going, I had no money to get there and I wasn’t going to risk going to the middle of nowhere to talk to him with the possibility of us arguing and me the being stranded. I sorry but that’s not happening. Especially when I get the text message at 11:30pm (approx)

I then suggested that we meet up the day after, for a coffee in the town where I was staying, which he knows well…to have this text ignored, and the next one. I gave up after that. Well and truly wound up I went home to my friends.

The day after, no response. Now I know it sounds desperate of me, but it’s taken far too log to get in contact with no remote explanation or anything. And it can’t be blamed on the family issues as the communication on twitter to his friends on there has not ceased nor have they been ignored.

My only opinions on it are;

A) there is no explanation or if there was it was to important and it was a ploy to annoy me.

B) he is too scared to tell me, which would account for the 87 day (I think that’s the amount) of no communication. In which case grow some bollocks and tell me. I stood by him long enough for him to know that I’d support him and help him if he needed it and if I could provide it

C) it’s something that already is or will effect me quite badly or seriously, and if this is the case, I am demanding to know as I think i deserve to know.

Now tell me if im being unreasonable on this, because I’m being ignored after he messaged me offering an explanation and cause I couldn’t get there then and do as he said, it seems to me the toys have been well and truly thrown out the pram.

Either that or a large quantity of alcohol had passed his lips before this text was sent.

So yes, aside from being head-fucked like so…I am rather lonely and need a hug.

From the one and only Mr. insensitive himself

Kieron Knight
XxXxXxX

PS if I don’t put anything up before Christmas and New Year, have a good holiday season and be safe. Be good and if you can’t, be good at it

X

Is so annoying its funny!

Recently I have been getting a fair bit of work with a new London based company. If you have been following me on Twitter (KieronKnightXXX) you would know that they have messed me around a bit regarding postponing shoots and changing dates.

Anyway, I am currently sat down at the studio, I have been here for two days and done nothing, models have come and gone and done their shoots…I’m still sat here waiting. I even had to film one of the scenes to give the cameraman a break!

Talking to the director last night, who decided to tell me they are going in for the more twinky companies, and I quote “we’ve had a few companies say to us they want more twinks, but the kind that are 18-19 years old but look 15-16″, now evidently if you have seen me, I am 23 but look 33 so I will NOT be able to do anything for them, even though they are huge budget films and all that shit. I didn’t think much more about it, as twinks don’t really do anything for me. I was a bit gutted cause I got regular work from these guys, and now that work will be very few and far between…mainly for private collectors rather than actual porn companies, and yeah it’s money, but I don’t want to just end up doing that.

I then got told to my surprise, that I HAD been cast in one of the twink films, a Dads fuck Lads film…not as a lad, oh no…AS THE FUCKING DAD! How gutted am I right now! Do I look like a bloody dad?! A I that old already at 23 that I look old enough to be a dad?!

After querying this I also got told that I got rejected from a load of future films, because apparently, I have “been around the block too much on the porn scene”, I’d love to know how as no fucker employs me!

Rather annoyed, but it’s fucking hilarious, some peoples principles and views…especially when they would be ever so happy to have some of the other UK porn stars in their films…you know, the ones who kiss arse and suck up to everyone and everything…not naming names.

But yes, how do I get around this? I am by no means a twink by UK standards no more, I’m too skinny to be a muscle lad…and too young to be a daddy…where does this leave me?

It went something like this…

I was working last night in Company Bar in Manchester where I do my day to day work. I didn’t finish there till gone 3:30am, feeling rather horny and with nowhere else to go, I decided to visit the Basement sauna. Now before any of you turn your noses up, I happen to enjoy going to saunas and the alike, being an exhibitionist and all that it feels comfortable and natural to me. So before people tarnish me with the “sauna is sleazy” brush, please remember that everyone has their likes and dislikes and I personally wouldn’t slate someone for their likes.

Anyway, I arrived at the sauna and had to pay a rather extortionate amount to get in as my membership was apparently due. Got in, no one in the changing room. Great…an empty bloody sauna. As I walked around I found that people were there…hiding in dark rooms, committing all sorts of heinous acts to their fellow man…and I loved it. After walking round checking out what this Thursday night had to offer. I went to use the steam room, after no one really catching my eye.

I sat down, towel off, relaxing in the steam. Once my eyes had become accustomed to the haze, I made out a groups of at least 4 guys in the corner going at it like rabbits. I couldn’t see who they were, what they looked like, nothing. Curiosity got the better of me, plus the horny factor of the anonymity of it, so I went over and put my cock in the hand of the nearest guy…who’s reaction went something like this “Holy fuck! What the fuck is that?” Now I believe if you ask a stupid question you get a stupid answer…however I simply replied “my cock, what do you think it is” to which he said “thats massive, I can’t take that!” (in all honesty I wasn’t asking him to anyway…just a quick fumble).

I left quickly and went to shower. Unbeknownst to me, I was being watched.

I continued to wash my self down, and spied another guy start to use the shower next to me. This guys was a god! Muscles upon muscles, hairy chest, about 30-32 and a gorgeous tan. I didn’t think guys like this existed in Manchester, what a surprise it was to find him. Now he had seen me soft, which is already a sight to behold if you go off what other people say. So he instantly suggested going to a room together. Off we trot to a cubicle. Give it about 5 minutes and he comes reeling out the room with a face of pure horror, makes his excuses and quickly walks off. It seems his eyes were a lot bigger then his arse, once I got hard he recoiled in fear and said that my cock was “scary looking” and “too big”, he couldn’t even suck it.

Now I’m not girthy by no means, I just have a lot of length. It is an average thickness, but just long. I never thought a cock could create so much fuss and horror…its not even an ugly cock.

So this makes me ask this question, what do you consider to be the perfect cock? As I’ve had mine been described as the perfect cock for fucking due to the curve, it’s also been described as small, huge, scary, bent…you name it, my cock has been called it, haha

Getting fed up, yes it’s a rant post but an important one, read if you’re a performer or a producer of porn

I’m getting somewhat fed up recently, of a few different things really. But the main one is, being ignored.

I have been in porn now for over 5 years, in that time I have had some mediocre shoots, a couple of good ones and the rest are forgettable, or this is how it seems from the reaction I get from other gay porn stars and companies. I have seen people rise and quickly fall due to their self inflated egos getting in the way. I have also seen unlikely stars rise from insecurity and self doubt, and they have gone on to big things. Me, I’ve sort of stayed floating around in the middle, not really fitting into any category and neither gaining popularity or losing it.

Regarding being ignored, over the past 3 to 4 years of me doing porn, more and more porn studios have shunned me or completely ignored me, for what reason I don’t know. I will not name names…yet, but it’s getting to a point where even I don’t realise what I’ve done wrong, if anything.

A prime example is this; I apply to a website, a website which I look at and think realistically, yes I am probably fitted to this website. I mean look at me, yes I am skinny and I don’t have much muscle, but there are guys on this website who are similar build to me…great I stand a chance. Only either to be told, “sorry you’re not right for the website” or simply ignored. This is rude, and at east have the balls to tell me the REAL reason why you don’t want to use me.

For example, a certain new UK porn website who’s main focus is “muscle jocks” (big clue there) told me, “I wasn’t right for the site, as they wanted muscle jocks and guys like that”, fine not a problem, but then why are you using a model who is skinnier than me who has a trouble getting hard on camera? In all fairness though that website is a bit of an ego trip for it’s owner(s) so I’ll let them have their fun.

One of the worst is a London based company that likes it’s lads “hard” (another clue), told me the first time I applied (bear in mind I had worked for the guy who runs this company when he was a cameraman for another) that I didn’t have the right body type, as I was to hairy and toned to be a twink, but beefy and muscled enough to be a stud/man/whatever you want to call it. I accepted this and started going to the gym, now for me it takes a lot to put weight on and even more so to build muscle. Anyway after a while of going to the gym, I had put on a surprising amount of muscle and toned up considerably. I applied again. To be told that he wasn’t hiring anyone from Manchester as he couldn’t afford the travel expense. In the meantime I had seen numerous models appear on his website of slim build, but not twinky…so in the same category that the put me. I was annoyed. Anyway he told me it was a distance thing now, I accepted this. Then I saw a model, from Manchester, who was the same build as me AND a notoriously bad model. This was the icing on the cake for me. How dare he lie to me

Another example, a lot of times companies and websites just simply ignore me, and value the newer faces or the old reliables…again this is where I don’t fit into anything.

I want to know before I go any further, what is wrong with me? Why do so many studios and companies ignore me or are so quick to push me aside?

I am a good model, I am versatile both in the sexual context and in the context that I can do most things or will give it a good try. I mean hell, twinks are really NOT my thing, and I have never been dominant before, but I did it, and I did around 13 shoots for BoyNapped. Was really not my thing, but I still did it, and it must have been good cause they used me and used me consistently.

Something has to give…I just need someone to tell me what I’m doing wrong, what’s wrong with me

There is nothing quite like the kindness of a stranger

Well, what can I say after last night. After I had finished work at 2am, I was about to go to the sauna for a little bit of fun and somewhere warm to stay till my first train in the morning. This did not go to plan as when I got ere they asked me for £14 to get in, when normally I pay only £8…this is even after they found out I was a member AND I worked in one of the bars in the village. Outraged I didn’t know where to go or what to do, luckily I remembered that one of the bars was open till 5am…which would mean I would have to wait only 5 hours after the bar closed to get my train, rather than waiting 8 out in the cold.

I went to AXM which closed at 5am, to find it full of straight drunk girls in badly fitting clothes and the inevitable drunk straight boys who feel the need to follow. This annoyed me as I felt a stranger in a gay bar. But thats by the by…with very little money left I bought a drink and sat in the corner watching the crowds. A doorman, from G-A-Y turned up, a man who has been a friend for a while and helped me out on numerous occasions, he seemed distant with me and not really interested…as he had a newer younger “friend” to play with. I ended up stood in a group of people I didn’t know, and didn’t particularly want to know, the camp bitchy type. So I waited for em to completely forget I was there and I snuck out. By this time It was 4am.

Stranded in Manchester till the banks opened (this is where I would have withdrawn my money to get a train) I walked around in the freezing cold and ended up at Piccadilly Gardens, where miraculously I found free Wi-Fi. It was a Godsend, I could talk to people and try to arrange something. With the intention of trying to crash on someone’s couch for the night, I logged into Facebook, Grindr, Twitter, you name it, I was on there. I had a few people msg me with the usual smut “There’s space in my bed if you want *wink wink*” and all that, but ideally I just wanted to sleep, as I had been awake by this point for 20 hours, and was working for the majority of those.

About to give up hope I got a message from a faceless profile on Grindr, which I don’t normally respond to, but for some reason I did. He asked me if I was still stuck, and if I needed somewhere to crash. At last some progress. It then transpired that he actually knew me, from Twitter AND Facebook and is a huge fan of my work. I had to retire to somewhere with heat as I was starting to get icicles from my extremities. I ended up in a 24-hour MacDonalds, which if I had remembered existed before, I would have gone and sat in sooner. We continued the conversation in there.

After a bit of chatting we ended up coming to the conclusion of him actually driving me back from Manchester City Centre to Haydock which is where I am temporarily staying. I didn’t know who was more shy at first to be honest, but it turned out he was a very nice guy, full of questions, which I didn’t mind at all.

A few people did say stuff like “oh that’s a bit creepy” or “height be a psycho” but at the end of the day, he wasn’t, he was a very kind young man who helped someone in need.

So Matthew, this is a huge thank you to you and I owe you big time

Thank you
Kieron

Oh happy day, work is coming my way

WOOHOO! After all this waiting and getting nothing I have finally got a consistent flow of work coming my way, I just hope it all goes good for me this time as God knows I need a spot of good luck right now.

As you may know, I recently had a trip to Prague cancelled or rather postponed, while I was out there I was going to be doing numerous scenes for different companies, and boy were there some big companies in that list…but I am not going to divulge names or anything yet at the risk of cursing it even more than what I might be doing now haha. Anyway, unfortunately that got postponed, however it is still going ahead thank God! In the meantime I have some work this week shooting a sleazy leather based film, with lots of rough dirty sex…just the way I like it.

So as soon as I know when its going to be released, expect a big update on that photos, links the lot!

Watch this space